Posts tagged agency
How to Create Your Happy Life Balance Using Circles of Influence & Control

A while back, I received an email from Soren Gordhamer, an entrepreneur and founder of the Wisdom 2.0 Conference. He wrote,

“Two things are pretty clear:

 We have limited heartbeats in this life.

 And

 We never know when our last heartbeat will be.”

If that’s not a call to be intentional and focus on what matters most, I don’t know what is. When thinking about creating a better, happier life balance, framing it in the context of our limited time can help.

Are you spending time and emotional energy on things that are within or out of your control? Are you stressing about ‘what ifs, shoulds, and if only?’  Or are you focused on those things that are doable, bring you joy, and make life flow better?

You have choices, which is a good thing.

 

  

Circles of Influence and Control

This idea of limited time connects to another concept I was recently reminded of in To Do – 41 Tools to Start, Stick With, and Finish Things by Mikael Krogerus and Roman Tshchappeler.

They shared a Steven Covey concept from his classic book The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People. It is the“circles of influence and control” technique to “help whenever we feel ineffectual, powerless or frustrated.” It’s also an excellent exercise for infusing better balance and focus into your days.

 

How to Create Your Circles – What You Can and Can’t Change

As the illustration below shows, draw three concentric circles.

1. Outer: Circle of Concern

  • Anything you have no control over belongs in the “concern” circle.

  • List several “things that bother you but you can’t do anything about.” Examples include:

    • Past events

    • The political climate

    • Natural disasters

    • Other people’s flaws

 

2. Center: Circle of Control

  • List several things you have agency over. These could be:

    • What you eat

    • Amount of sleep you get

    • People you hang out with

    • Amount of organization you have

    • Books you read

    • Movies you watch

  • Some might seem trivial, but they significantly influence our lives. Add these to your “control” list.

There’s immense power in knowing which things in our lives we can and can’t control.
— Mikael Krogerus and Roman Tschappeler

3. Middle: Circle of Influence

  • Include here things that aren’t in your control, yet you might be able to influence through your attitude or behavior. For example,

    • It’s impossible to “single-handedly avert climate change, but you can do something about it by living sustainably.”

    • You cannot “change your genes, but you can exercise regularly and eat more healthfully.”

    • You have no power over circle of concern events. However, you can influence or change your reaction to them.

 

 

How Does This Exercise Help?

The more you focus on those things you have no control over (circle of concern), the “more helpless and ineffectual you’ll feel.” However, when you focus on what is within your control (circle of influence and circle of control,) “the more confident and less anxious you’ll be.”

This exercise can heighten your awareness of how you’re spending your precious time. Focusing on areas you have agency and influence over can tip the balance in a more positive direction.

 

 

A Balanced Life Approach

You only go around once. How can you balance your days to include those things within your control and influence? What can you improve? What can you let go of?  I’d love to hear your thoughts and invite you to join the conversation.

Do you want help decluttering, organizing, planning, or finding a right balance for you? I’d love to help and I’m here for you. Virtual organizing is an extraordinary path forward – A local feel with a global reach.

Please schedule a Discovery Call, email me at linda@ohsorganized.com, or call 914-271-5673. Organization, balance, and ease are possible, especially with support.

 
 
3 Positive Ways Getting Organized Will Reduce Suffering and Improve Your Well-Being

What becomes possible when you get organized enough? Will you suffer less? Will your mental health and well-being improve due to better organization and flow?

For over 30 years, I have been a professional organizer, helping overwhelmed individuals challenged by disorganization get unstuck and organized.

I’ve observed a direct correlation between disorganization and distress. Creating order in the areas within your control significantly improves your external and internal state of being.

Recently, I had the joy of speaking with John Burton, a singer, songwriter, author, and host of the Home From Here podcast. John is fascinated by the intersection of organization and mental health, and he invited me to talk about that and much more on his show.

I invite you to listen to the podcast, episode 193, to hear the entire conversation. You might even discover a few surprising personal details, such as how I start my day, what my household was like growing up, and my favorite color. Although, I bet you can guess that last one even without listening to the podcast. You all know me so well.

Read about these three ideas I featured from our conversation about organization and well-being, and enjoy the podcast, too.

Home From Here - Episode 193 - John Burton with guest Linda Samuels



3 Ways Getting Organized Reduces Suffering and Improves Your Well-Being

1. “Organization made me feel better.”

John Burton, Home From Here podcast host with Linda Samuels - Episode 193

John noticed that organizing specific areas of his life made him feel better. You can learn more about his mental health journey from our conversation. One of the things he mentioned was how life-changing it was to organize his time and habits, especially his morning routine. As John experienced, better organization enhanced his day’s flow and well-being. He “felt better.”

Many of my clients have mental health challenges, including depression, anxiety, bipolar disorder, and OCD. The organizing piece has been elusive. Often, the external chaos reflects what’s happening internally. Through our work, I see a positive shift as we remove the disorganization blockages, create manageable systems, and focus on being “organized enough.” It’s not about perfection but about organizing in a way that helps you live with more ease.

What will be possible as you feel better?



2. “If I could only get it all done, life would be perfect.”

John asked me about the “trick” to time management. There are many different philosophies about managing yourself and your time, and there isn’t one definitive trick. However, I’ll share two significant principles of time management.

The first thing to understand about time management is acknowledging that you’ll never get it all done. And just so you know, I say those words as someone who is highly optimistic. People often think life would be perfect if you could “only get it all done.”

Whether your to-do list is in your head, on paper, or on an electronic list, as soon as you cross off a completed task, a new item appears. That’s the human condition. If you’re alive, you will have things to get done.

Even when your list is overflowing, I encourage you to embrace opportunities for joy and delight and let go of perfection. As John said, “If you can accept imperfection, stress goes way down.”

The second time management concept is about clarifying your priorities. Focus on aligning your priorities with what you spend time on. In addition, not all tasks will be related to things you’re passionate about. There are life management responsibilities like doing laundry, getting groceries, showering, or paying bills. Those might not excite you, but they are a necessary part of living.

Does all or most of your time go to life maintenance? Is little to no time reserved for your passions or priorities? If so, looking at where your time is going and making some adjustments is helpful.

What becomes possible when your priorities are clarified?

If you can accept imperfection, stress goes way down.
— John Burton

3. “I can see a path forward.”

John and I discussed virtual organizing and how I typically have 60-minute Zoom sessions with my clients. My goal is to help them get unstuck enough to take action, make progress, and feel better.

At the beginning of a session, clients might feel overwhelmed, discouraged, or hopeless. By the end of the hour, they’ve experienced progress (a physical change, perspective shift, or new system) and can see possibilities.

We take baby steps that boost confidence and agency. Progress happens during and between the organizing sessions. Clients learn organizational skills and how to integrate them into their busy lives.

 What will be possible as you clear your path?

 

  

What is Possible?

Toward the end of our conversation, John said he was “struck” by “the amount of reducing suffering” I’m doing.

Life has hiccups and stress. I am passionate about helping my clients get unstuck, make progress, live with more ease, and feel better. Getting organized enough, letting go of perfection, shifting perspectives, and focusing on priorities can make a significant difference. What is possible for you? I’d love to hear your thoughts. I invite you to join the conversation.

Are you ready to get unstuck, organize, and improve your well-being? If so, I’m here to help. Please schedule a Discovery Call, email me at linda@ohsorganized.com, or call 914-271-5673. Turning possibilities into reality is achievable, especially with support.