It’s a popular time of year to reflect back and imagine forward. If you’re thinking about change and balance, you’re not alone. Finding a balance that feels right for you includes combining a mix of ingredients. I was interested in looking at a range of perspectives on this topic, so I reached out to a generous group of colleagues (Joshua Becker, Leslie Josel, Erin Doland, Andrea Sharb, Judith Kolberg, Janine Adams, Janet Barclay, Ellen Delap, Sue West, Aby Garvey, Yota Schneider). I asked them, “With the arrival of the New Year, what do you want more of and less of to create your desired balance?” Their responses are interesting and motivating. My deepest gratitude goes to each of them for digging deep and sharing with us their plans for next year. If you’re wondering how to create more balance, keep reading for some inspired ideas.

With the arrival of the New Year, what do you want more of and less of  to create your desired balance? . . .

More Focus : Less Distraction

“More focus on the important things. Less distraction on the little.”

Joshua Becker – Founder of Becoming Minimalist

More Quiet : Less Noise

“My perfect balance would be MORE time, patience, deliberate decision-making, gratitude and quiet.  I could use a lot LESS useless noise, reactionary decision-making, pressure and distractions.  With those in place, the rest would hopefully fall into place!”

Leslie Josel – ADHD Coach, Author, & Speaker

More Sleep : Less Deprivation

“When you regularly get the sleep your body needs at night, you have more energy and are a better decision maker during the day. It's even easier to put things away after using them and keep up with chores when getting good sleep. With a three month old, I haven't been getting the sleep my body and brain crave to function at their best. In 2014, I need more sleep. I need to go to bed earlier each night so I can better accomplish my goals and feel better during the day. Good, quality sleep is like gaining super powers. I recommend it for everyone, not just moms with children.”

Erin Doland – Editor-in-Chief at Unclutter.com

More Simplicity : Less Stuff

“I'm at a point in my life where I'm actively embracing the idea of less and am pursuing a ‘smaller’, more focused life: less stuff, simpler lifestyle, and fewer activities & commitments.  Having a less complicated lifestyle will yield more time and energy for what matters most to me these days: personal connections, healthy living, following my curiosity, learning, practicing and continuing to create a business model that most authentically represents my values and appeals to the needs of my clients.”

Andrea Sharb, CPO-CD®, ACC®, COC® & CPO® – Professional Organizer & Productivity/ADHD Coach

More Sacrifice : Less Stress

“If we're too tipped to the side of fun in life and we neglect our work commitments, that is a kind of imbalance that can cause all sorts of stress such as unpaid bills, debt, not seeing things through, or a reputation for being unreliable. On the other hand, if we work ourselves to death and don't tip things over to the fun, relaxing, recreating side of life, we can likewise be unhappy and stressed. So balance is important. I tend to take a long view on balance. For instance, when I'm writing a book, I can sacrifice friends, family, and fun because I can see the light at the end of the tunnel. So my life can be terrifically unbalanced in favor of work, but I know it’s only temporary. When I travel, I hardly do any work. I'm fine with knowing projects await me after I'm done goofing off. Try to be as proactive as you can about when you will deliberately unbalance your life in favor of work or leisure. And take a long view – life will balance out over the longer term. And oh yea, keep that light at the end of the tunnel nice and bright!”

Judith Kolberg – Award-winning Professional Organizer & Humble Thought-Leader

More Research : Less Tolerance

“In 2014, I want to do more family history research. Over the past couple of years I've become more serious about genealogy research (and started the blog Organize Your Family History), but I'm still not spending as much time researching my family history, as I'd like. I'd also like to tolerate small annoyances less. Life gets so much better when I take the time to move or reorganize or fix things, rather than just put up with them. This year, I want to take action to change, rather than passively tolerate, the little things that make me frustrated.”

Janine Adams, CPO®, CPO-CD® – Professional Organizer, Speaker, & Blogger

More Planning : Less Guilt

“I believe that more planning will be the key to balance for me in the New Year. Deciding in advance how I’ll spend a particular block of work time will make me more productive and profitable, and I’ll experience less guilt from not focusing on my priorities. Similarly, by planning my leisure time, I’ll face less frustration because instead of simply frittering those hours away, I’ll be filling them with pleasurable activities, which will bring me more enjoyment and fulfillment.”

Janet Barclay – Blogger, WordPress Website Designer, & Virtual Assistant to Professional Organizers

More Connection : Less Commitments

“Focusing on more and less helps me prioritize.  We can’t have more of everything in our lives.  In 2014, I want more time with colleagues and community through social media and community involvement. I plan to spend less time on larger commitments and more on smaller ones that require just one or two small tasks for completion.”

Ellen Delap, CPO® – Professional Organizer, Productivity Consultant, & Blogger

More Flexibility :  Less Doubt

“Sue West’s ‘life balance’ ingredients: intuition I listen to, understanding of who I am and what I stand for (values, strengths, character), acknowledging that I have choices more often than I don’t have them, embracing that I have limited time on Earth and in my days, wisdom, creativity, perspective to respond but not react, and curiosity so I challenge, learn and grow. Mix ingredients differently each day to sustain whatever balance looks like in those moments. When I 'have' balance, I feel it. When I don’t feel it, I know how to get back there.”

Sue West – ADHD & Life Management Coach, Certified Professional Organizer in Chronic Disorganization®

More Veggies : Less Carbs

“A few years ago, my family and I decided to change the mix of ingredients in our diet. We decided to subtract out one meat-based dinner per week, and add in one vegetarian meal per week. Over time, we have cut out most of the red meat, pork and poultry from our diet. This has been great...except that we've gotten out of balance with carbohydrates. As we head into the New Year, one of my goals is to bring back the balance in my diet, by subtracting out some carbs and adding in more veggies and plant-based proteins.”

Aby Garvey – Professional Organizer, Author, & Online Class Instructor

More Playtime : Less Worry

“This past year I’ve been confronted with the inevitable endings and new beginnings that made me want to hide. My father’s passing and my mother’s failing health juxtaposed my twin daughters entering their junior year and madly preparing for college. No dress rehearsal for parents of twins; it all happens at once. My coaching practice, growing parallel to my daughters, is demanding a new level of creativity, focus, and discipline. What I need more of are trust, playtime, and reaching out. I can do with less worry, doubt, and hiding. Key words for me; simple, clear, immediate, meaningful, loving.”

Yota Schneider  - Seasons of Change Certified Master Coach & Life Transitions Coach

Isn’t it fascinating how differently everyone answered the question? Responses ranged from specific to general, and from brief to more elaborate. I feel so inspired by their clarity and conviction. They will be wonderful guides as I define my next steps. What resonates with you? What would you like more or less of for this coming year? I invite you to to explore with us. Join the conversation.

Wishing you a happy, healthy, successful, joy-filled, New Year with your right mix of more and less!

While mindfulness is part of my daily practice, these days I find myself in more of an anticipation mode. This distracts my attention away from now. I feel the pull between my desire to be present and my thoughts about planning for next year. These rumblings mess with my sense of balance. I’m teetering on the seesaw going up and down between now and later. Is it just me, or is anyone else feeling this way?

One of the magazines I enjoy reading regularly is Real Simple. The January issue is about life balance. It has an assortment of interesting articles, statistics, and viewpoints. What struck me most was the cover, which had a variety of words that suggested the promise of “how to live the balanced life.” I thought it would be interesting to share them, but alter the context. Instead of specifically focusing on gadgets, wardrobes and diets as they did, let’s instead use the verbs to concentrate on what’s most important to you.

Are you ready to experiment? Read the list below. Fill in as many blanks as you wish. Declare the changes you want to make for the coming year.

1. Reduce - If I had less (__), I’d feel more balanced. Letting go can propel us forward, help us feel calmer, and be less stressed. Overabundance can lead to overwhelm. What do you want to less of? What will you reduce?

2. Increase - If I had more (__), I’d feel more balanced. This might be about the stuff, but more probably, it’s about time, people, and growth. What do you want more of? What will you increase?

3. Improve - If I improved (__), I’d feel more balanced.   Is there an area you’d like to challenge yourself in like eating more nutritiously, learning a new skill, or honing one you already have? What area do you want to tweak? What would you like to improve?

4. Simplify - If I simplified (__), I’d feel more balanced. We live in a complex world. How can you rethink your days to remove the layers of complexity? Can you change your routines, commitments, or schedule? What can you streamline? What will you simplify?

5. Make - If I made (__), I’d feel more balanced.            The act of creating something can infuse us with energy, joy, and satisfaction. Creativity comes in many forms from writing to singing to cooking to dancing to painting and more. Where do you want to channel your creative juices? What do you want to make?

6. Solve - If I solved (__), I’d feel more balanced.              Do you have a challenge and feel stuck? Sometimes we need help figuring out the next step. Can you reach out for brainstorming or delegation help to find a solution? Who can you ask? What will move you forward? What would you like to solve?

Was this exercise useful? Are there any additions you’d like to add to the list? I’d love to hear your thoughts. Which words resonate with you? Come join the conversation.

Dan Thurmon "Ask the Expert" interview about Life BalanceWe’ve had an exciting year of guests join us for the “Ask the Expert” interview series. We’ve given you a venue to connect with industry thought leaders and the opportunity to participate in inspiring conversations. This year we’ve spoken with Dr. Howard Gardner about being wonderfully human, Jane Pollak about possibility thinking, Dorothy Breininger about success, Dr. April Lane Benson about enlisting help, Leslie Josel about motivation, David Allen about time management, Peter Walsh about clutter, Sheila Delson about letting go, Laura Berman Fortgang about next steps, Judith Kolberg about change, and Sue West about fresh starts. To complete the year, I’m thrilled to bring you speaker, author, and coach, Dan Thurmon, to share his insights about life balance.

I’m a big Dan Thurmon fan! I’ve attended hundreds of presentations on a wide range of topics. Dan is one of the most unique, charming, and energy-filled presenters I’ve ever seen. I’ve had the pleasure of hearing him speak and perform twice at NAPO conferences as he motivated, enlightened, and persuaded us all while juggling large objects, tumbling through the air, and riding tall unicycles. Dynamic doesn’t begin to describe Dan! If you ever have the opportunity to hear him...GO! My gratitude goes to Dan for juggling his schedule and taking the time to join us. Before we begin, here’s more about him.

Dan Thurmon is the author of two books, Off Balance on Purpose and Success in Action, a renowned speaker, and a recognized expert in delivering peak performances – on stage and in the workplace. As president of Motivation Works, Inc., he has worked with hundreds of clients and delivered thousands of presentations worldwide. Dan helps organizations and individuals implement action plans and move confidently through transitions. You can connect with Dan on Twitter, Facebook, LinkedIn, blog or website.

Linda Samuels:  People long for balance. I’ve heard you say that while that’s “intriguing and desirable,” it’s also “completely unrealistic.” Can you share more about that?

Dan Thurmon:  Life is fluid and ever changing, so we cannot attain “perfect balance.” Balance should not be a goal but rather a skill. We “balance” competing demands for time, energy and action. We make decisions and adjustments to help improve our connection to what matters most in life. But our day-to-day experience is and will always be “off balance.” And that’s a good thing! You must be “off balance” in order to learn, grow, and contribute. That’s why I advocate living Off Balance On Purpose. This means that you own your circumstances, initiate changes, and act deliberately, not reactively. Also, we are more effective and engaged when our actions and lives are infused with purpose and meaning.

Linda:  Aside from being a world-class speaker, coach, and author, you are also a consummate performer and juggler. You use juggling concepts to help your audiences understand your message. What is your favorite juggling analogy about life balance?

Dan:  Well thank you! Juggling is a fantastic metaphor that teaches us, among other lessons, that we should look for “patterns” that connect the objects – or, our objectives. Instead of trying to isolate aspects of your life, look for ways to integrate them into a cohesive “pattern of action.” The other analogy involves riding a six-foot-tall unicycle as I demonstrate that, in order to make forward progress, you must be off balance, leaning into the change and uncertainty. It’s scary, but also exhilarating, as you are harnessing momentum for change!

Linda:  What strategies are useful when we’re feeling overwhelmed and pulled in too many directions?

Dan:  First, seek to clarify your purpose. What are you really trying to accomplish, and why is it important? And I don’t have to tell you that being organized is essential to staying in control. I believe it starts with organizing your thinking instead of being constantly redirected by the next “urgent” task. Also, I teach people how to create and strengthen “lifelines” between the aspects of life that matter most: Work, Relationships, Health, Spiritual Growth, and Personal Interests. If you view these “five spheres” as competing with one another, you will fight a losing battle. When you see them as integrated or blended into a “pattern,” however, you begin to see how they can support one another and work in harmony.

Linda:  What has been your toughest personal life balance challenge?

Dan:  As a husband and father of two children (ages 14 and 10), it is a challenge when my schedule takes me on the road for days at a time. But my wife and I have worked over the years to strengthen the “lifelines” that keep us connected. Sometimes I travel with my whole family, or with one of my kids. We often talk about the places I am visiting and the clients I work with. I’ve also used both of my kids, Eddie and Maggie, in my presentations. That way they truly understand what I do and we stay more connected, even when we are apart. And of course, I schedule family time at home to be sure they know how much they mean to me.

Linda:  What is your most surprising discovery about being “off balance?”

Dan:  When you develop a comfort with uncertainty, you often find new, fantastic opportunities that you would have otherwise missed completely. Life is exciting and ever changing, and when you find the “flow” of life and are able to engage its power, like a surfer atop a breaking wave, you will meet people, go places, and serve others in unexpected, wonderful ways.

Linda:  Is there anything you’d like to share about life balance that I haven’t asked?

Dan:  We’ve been told by well-intentioned experts that should we one day achieve a “balanced life,” we will be happier. But life is not a hypothetical future. It’s an undeniable present! And when you embrace uncertainty and choose to live Off Balance On Purpose, you will begin to experience greater happiness and control right where you are.

Thank you, Dan for sharing your wisdom about balance, or more accurately, living purposely off balance. So many of your ideas resonate with me from reframing balance not as a goal, but a skill, to acting deliberately instead of reactively, to developing a comfort with uncertainty, to leaning into change. I love your focus about now being, the “undeniable present,” rather than a “hypothetical future.” I could go on and on. But instead, let me open up the conversation to all of you.

I invite you to join Dan and me. Come share your thoughts about life balance. Is it illusive? What does balance look like to you? Have ideas sparked a perspective shift?

Perhaps now, more than any other season, it’s a time of giving. Enticements to shop, spend, and find those perfect gifts, along with increased solicitation requests to make charitable donations, fuel our urge to give. We feel good and balanced when we give. I’m not just talking about physical or monetary gifts.

In the last few weeks, I’ve experienced how giving comes in many other forms.

7 Types of Gifts Your People Will Love

Gift of Time – Recently, my husband and I were invited to share a lovely home cooked meal and leisurely conversation with wonderful friends. After dinner, we went to a reading of new play sponsored by the Hudson Stage Company. We continued our evening out with dessert and coffee at a local restaurant. The gift was in the time spent together.

Gift of Teaching  – My daughter, who is an excellent cook, gave me cooking lessons for my birthday. She is the teacher. Allison created and put on a flash drive a list of her favorite cooking sites and recipes. The gift includes purchasing the ingredients and making five main dishes and desserts that we’ll cook together. So far we’ve had two lessons. She’s a great teacher and fabulous company. Cooking, smiling, talking, wine drinking, all while learning from my daughter.

Gift of Repair  – There are always things that need fixing. I feel lucky that my husband happens to be pretty darn amazing at repairing things when he has the time. Of course, time is what’s in the shortest supply. Recently, he fixed an overhead light by installing a new socket. It’s a light I regularly use that had literally been on the blink for a long time. Every time I turn it on, I think of Steve. I’m grateful for him and his expertise. This was a simple, yet love-filled repair.

Gift of Music – We were at a recent holiday party with live Cajun and Zydeco music. Being that many of the guests were also musicians, they brought their instruments so they could jam together. As they played, sharing their gifts, I listened and danced. It was joyful.

Gift of Warmth – At that same party with the live music, there was also an outdoor fire going. At one point, I found myself outside in the cold air, entranced by the fire. It gave off such warmth. And it wasn’t just the heat. As I sat there, watching the flames swirl and roar, different people came and went sharing stories, conversation, and laughter. I was warm from the fire and the good company.

Gift of Donating  – Like you, I’m sure there are many local and international charities that you regularly support. We can donate time, money, or both. Some of the charities that I regularly give to include the Institute for Challenging Disorganization, National Association of Professional Organizers, Guiding Eyes for the Blind, Temple Israel of Northern Westchester, and the Croton Caring Committee.

Gift of Gratitude – There is so much to be grateful for like our family, friends, health, work, and well-being. I’m thankful for my amazing clients and the trust they have in me to help them with their organizing challenges. I’m in awe of their perseverance, creativity, intelligence, and warmth. To express my appreciation, I just launched a Client Loyalty Program, which automatically rewards Oh, So Organized! clients for their ongoing loyalty and trust. To find out more, click here.

It’s the giving season. I’m sure you’ll have plenty of opportunities to be on both the giving and receiving end. Ben Carson said, “Happiness doesn’t result from what we get, but from what we give.”  I suspect it’s actually a bit of each – a balance between giving and learning how to receive. What resonates with you? What are you noticing this giving season?