Many of my virtual organizing clients are overwhelmed by clutter, so they reach out for help. One of the common threads is the sense they need to postpone all fun and joy until they completely declutter. In truth, it’s challenging to work intensely without taking a break or replenishing your reserves. Having joy-infused counterbalances to organizing can bring renewed energy and focus.

Earlier this week, I had an Executive Mom Nest meeting where we talked about ways to prioritize joy. Transformational Coach Advisor Leesa Askew gave us a writing exercise to list 20 things that bring us joy. They didn’t have to be big things. Our lists mainly focused on simple stuff. Some of mine included:

• Taking that first sip of coffee in the morning 

• Walking in nature

• Walking with a friend

• Writing in my journal

• Being at the beach

• Sitting in the sun

• Taking photos

• Talking with our kids

• Smelling the lilacs

At the end of the meeting, we were encouraged to select one item from our joy list and commit to doing it that day. I knew right away which one to choose- smelling the lilacs! As their blooming season is short, I didn’t want to miss the opportunity to take in their intoxicating scent.

While running errands, I had driven past this gorgeous blooming bush of lilacs several times. I thought, “Linda, stop the car, get out, and smell them.”  However, in the interest of getting things done, I kept driving. Or, I chose to postpone this simple moment of joy to do other things. Does that sound familiar? Have you ever decided not to have fun or lean into a special moment because you were preoccupied with something else?

After the prioritizing joy conversation, I made an intentional trip to the lilacs. When I arrived, I parked my car and walked down the block. I leaned over, placed my nose close to the lavender flowers, took a deep breath, and let the fragrance flood my senses. It was a happy moment.

“Prioritizing joy and decluttering aren’t mutually exclusive.”

— Linda Samuels, CPO-CD®, CVPO

For you, joy might come in other forms. Instead of nature, lilacs, and sun, you might prefer a coffee date with a friend, curling up with a good book, or eating by candlelight. The possibilities abound. You can simultaneously prioritize decluttering, organizing, or any large project and engage in joyous moments. Prioritizing joy and decluttering aren’t mutually exclusive. In fact, prioritizing regular encounters with delight will help you approach the challenging parts of your day with clarity and perspective.

Do you postpone fun and joy when you’re feeling overwhelmed by clutter? What brings you joy? What overwhelms you? I’d love to hear your thoughts. I invite you to join the conversation.

One of my obsessions, which you might not know about, is “tiny houses” and the tiny house movement. I am in awe of living with less (less space, less stuff) and how small spaces are designed. I love watching the Netflix show, Tiny House Nation, adding images to my Oh, So Tiny Houses! Pinterest board, and reading about people living the tiny house lifestyle. My fantasy is to sell our home (and most of our stuff) and move into a tiny house.

My husband, Steve, doesn’t share my enthusiasm for this idea. He has expressed many times, “I don’t want to live in a tiny house and get rid of all of my stuff. I like my stuff. Where would I put all of my signs?”  Steve is a collector of many things, including large porcelain advertising signs.  Then he clarified that if we did move into a tiny house, we’d need two of them to “keep the peace.”

In the early summer, with tiny house fantasies and vacation planning on my mind, I discovered a unique place in the Catskills. A Tiny House Resort, where we could experience firsthand what tiny home living was like. Steve was game and knew this would be fun, but also help me experience viscerally what tiny living was all about. I booked us an adorable 350 square foot little house complete with a full kitchen, bathroom with five-foot tub, space to sleep four people, fire pit, pergola, and outdoor gas grill. What fun! This family-run resort is situated along the Catskill Creek, has beautiful walking trails, a waterfall, and an outdoor heated swimming pool. There are farm animals, including goats (available for Goat Yoga,) sheep, free-range chickens laying fresh eggs that guests can have, vegetable and herb garden to pick from, giant-sized (not tiny) outdoor chess, and checkers, and so much more.

Four Tiny House Life Lessons

Life Lesson One: Defining Too Cozy

My ah-ha moment came when I approached our tiny house, opened the door, and walked in. I knew in an instant that I could never live full-time in one. Why? It was too small. I told Steve, and he smiled- well, maybe he belly laughed. While it was fantastic spending a long weekend there with him in this cozy and unique space, it is not how I want to live all the time. Although we both agreed that we could if we had to.

Life Lesson Two: Not So Small Afterall

The second ah-ha came when we returned back to our own home, which we’ve always called “small.” Our home felt spacious after four days of living in the tiny house. This realization reinforced that my tiny house fantasy is just that- a fantasy. I am happy and deeply grateful to live in our rightly sized home. I felt very much like Goldilocks when she sat in the “just right” chair. I discovered that our house is “just right” for us.

“I want to prioritize being and doing over acquiring and managing. ”

— Linda Samuels, CPO-CD®, CVPO™

Life Lesson Three: Live With Less

I also recognized that even though I no longer aspire to live in a tiny home, which is defined as between 100 to 400 square feet, I am interested in living with less. It was so apparent how little we needed when we stayed at the tiny house resort. Instead of 30 drinking glasses, there were four. Instead of silverware for 40, there were 4 spoons, forks, and knives. We had just enough, but not more than enough. It felt liberating. 

So when I returned home, I started to not just think about editing my stuff. I actually began letting go. A bag of books was filled and donated to the library. I went through my files and filled up three large bags of paper to recycle and shred. That’s just the beginning. My plan is to go through each room and find things that no longer have value, are taking up space, or have overstayed their welcome. 

I don’t feel pressure or have a specific timeframe for doing this. It will be a relaxed and ongoing process.

Life Lesson Four: Clarifying My Why

Our tiny house experience inspired me not to move but to discover what living with just enough feels like. I’m hyperaware of the 80/20 rule and frequently share this with clients. We only refer to 20% of the papers we file, wear 20% of the clothes we own, read or refer to 20% of the books on our shelves, use 20% of the kitchen gadgets, and so on. I want to review and potentially let go of close to 80% of the things I never use, access, or need. I recognize this is ambitious, but I am open to the process. Why should the stuff I collected and don’t use take up valuable physical real estate and emotional energy? Why should I leave the things I no longer want for our kids to have to sort through when I’m gone? I acquired these things. It’s my responsibility to decide their future.

Lastly, and perhaps most importantly, our tiny living weekend allowed us the freedom to live and not spend much time caring for the physical stuff of life. Less time cleaning and decision-making meant more time for kayaking, walking in the Catskill Creek, hanging out by the waterfall, swimming, picking peppers and basil from the garden, preparing and eating meals together, and enjoying our time together. Yes. I get that we were on vacation. But even so, going forward, I want to prioritize being and doing over acquiring and managing. We only go around once. 

Have you considered tiny house living? If so, do you need help editing? Do you feel overwhelmed by your things, or do you have just enough? I’d love to hear your thoughts. I invite you to join the conversation.

We turned the page on the first month of the year and have arrived in February. Is anyone else wondering, “Where the @!#?! did January go?” I sure am. Last month, many of us were motivated by the fresh start signal a New Year brings. This month, we are poised and ready to embrace change. What will that mean for you? What changes are you pursuing? Is there a secret to initiating successful change? That’s where this story begins.

It isn’t the first time I’ve written about my love of fortune cookies. Yes. I do like the taste and their unique shape. But it’s the fortune that I really love. To me, it’s thrilling to discover a well-timed message tucked into my cookie. So when we order takeout, I always buy additional cookies- at least a dozen. Because why skimp on fun? Over the weekend, we did just that. When it came time for dessert, my husband and I started eating the cookies and reading the fortunes. Some fortunes were so-so, and others made no sense. But then, I read this one, and I knew I had to share it with you.

“The greatest lever for change is awareness.”

— Fortune cookie

A Wow Moment

Let’s savor that one. “The greatest lever for change is awareness.”  How can we change if we don’t know what we want to pursue, what challenge needs solving, or the next step? The changes we pursue begin with awareness. Noticing might be subtle at first. It could be a rumble, inkling, or a feeling. It could show up as frustration, like the challenge of getting dressed when closets are overflowing and disorganized. Maybe you feel overwhelmed and stressed because your schedule is filled with so many commitments that you have no time to breathe. Change is only possible when you notice and become aware. Change begins there.

Master Awareness Skills

We are constantly scanning our day, using cues to transition, change, and maintain habits. We wake in the morning as the sun rises. The daylight cues us to begin the day. We feel a twinge in our stomach, which indicates it’s time to eat something. We see the snow falling, which clues us that shoveling-time is coming. We see the sun setting and know workday wrap-up is close. We walk in the door and see the bowl, which reminds us to drop our keys in their ‘home.’ All of these things are tied to awareness. Change begins by noticing a distinct cue or indicator. 

“Change begins by noticing a distinct cue or indicator.”

— Linda Samuels, CPO-CD®, CVPO

Our awareness increases our readiness for change. As you pay attention to the cues to maintain your habits or transition from one part of the day to the next, you develop your awareness skills. Your noticing abilities are available to help you discover the indicators, which will encourage change.

Have you experienced rumblings that might indicate it is time for a change? What have you noticed? What change are you ready to make? I’d love to hear your thoughts. I invite you to join the conversation.

Time is universal. We all have the same 24 hours in a day. Yet how we choose to use and feel about that time varies widely. You have scheduled and unscheduled time, hours spent doing what you enjoy and what you don’t. Your days can be intentional or haphazard, filled with obligations, commitments, fun, rest, and challenges.

Lately, I’ve noticed how many moments of joy and delight are present even in these uncertain times. With so much unrest and distress around us, why am I writing about happiness? Especially when life is hard, it’s essential to acknowledge and embrace moments that fill you with delight.

The pandemic changed our daily lives. Opportunities to try new things emerged during the shift. Surprisingly, in this chaos, some beautiful moments emerged. I’ll share a few things I’ve recently experienced, hoping they will spark some ideas for you. 

5 Ways to Take Time for Delight

1. Watch Tomatoes Grow

Earlier this month, I created my first mini garden in our greenhouse. One of the vegetables I planted were cherry tomatoes. Each day I check to see how they’re doing. I water or mist them as needed. Little yellow flowers started blooming, which are magically becoming tomatoes-to-be. Right now, they are round, green balls that will hopefully turn bright red. It’s a simple thing, but it makes me smile with delight every time I check on their growth. It feels good to nurture them and watch the changes.

2. Cut Hair with Scissors

You’re probably thinking, how else would you cut hair? Of course, you use scissors (or a clipper!) The thing is I’ve never cut hair other than the disastrous time I cut my mother’s hair when I was 10 years old. My husband hasn’t been able to get his hair cut during the pandemic, so I offered to “try.” I was amazed that Steve trusted me to cut, especially since he knew about the mom incident. While I don’t plan on opening a salon, it turns out I’m not half bad at cutting hair. The great discovery is that I love doing it!  I feel giddy when I cut. It’s so satisfying to snip away, kind of like hair decluttering. I’ve learned one lesson. Don’t say, “Oops,” if you chop off more than you meant to.

“Especially when life is hard, it’s essential to acknowledge and embrace moments that fill you with delight.”

— Linda Samuels, CPO-CD®

3. Walk Socially Distant with Friend

It wasn’t that long ago we could walk where we wanted, with whoever we wanted, as closely as we wanted, and mask-free. But times have changed. The only walks I’ve taken in these past months have been by myself or with my husband. Since New York recently loosened the stay-in-place orders, I felt comfortable trying a socially distant (and masked) walk with one of my friends. While we have had regular Zoom calls during this time, we haven’t seen each other in person. It felt beyond fantastic to be physically close to my good friend as we walked, talked, and looked at one another. And while it was a bit weird not to be able to hug, it was so joyful to be actually rather than virtually together. 

4. Sit in Different Chairs

I’ve found ways to experiment with new perspectives with so much time at home these past months. It’s not that I was bored, but I felt like shifting things around to see what would happen. We added a few new chairs to our outdoor collection, so we moved furniture around to integrate the pieces. We placed chairs where they had never been before, which encouraged us to sit in new locations. The change was surprising because the new placements had different views and feel. Now when I go outside, instead of sitting in the exact same spot, I like to move around to try out other positions. Oddly, these simple changes make me feel similar to being on vacation because they both bring about perspective shifts. 

5. Take the Less Traveled Path

I love walking in the woods and by the rivers. There are regular and favorite walks I take, like down the block or the path along the Hudson River. But there are other places I walk less frequently like a park several towns south of where I live. Over the weekend, my husband and I decided to go to the park we rarely visit. There were many changes from the last time we went there. I loved noticing and appreciating the differences. Our prior visit was in early spring when the daffodils were blooming, and the leaves on the trees were starting to green. This time, yellow flowers were gone, and the trees were so full that some of the trunks were hidden. There were birds and butterflies all around. I loved exploring the less familiar path with spectacular river views.

Time keeps moving, whether we’re having good days or tough ones. There are ways to make time for joy-filled moments. I’d love to hear your thoughts. What moments delight you? I invite you to join the conversation.