Do you resist asking for help? Maybe you’re unsure who to ask, prefer to do things yourself, or feel too overwhelmed to figure out what guidance you need. However, there are so many reasons to enlist support.

As a professional organizer, I am in the helping industry and love assisting my clients. I help overwhelmed individuals challenged by disorganization get unstuck and organized. Services can include assisting with long and short-term projects, providing accountability, editing, decluttering, designing customized organizing solutions, brainstorming, and planning.

While I like to do many things independently, I ask for help, too. Support has been incredibly beneficial for:

• Redesigning my website

• Writing and publishing a book

• Installing a new roof

• Working on boards and committees

• Trimming trees

• Creating my office space

• Hosting holiday dinners

• Caring for my parents

• Maintaining my health

• Producing my virtual workshops

• Maintaining our home

• Talking through personal and business challenges

“Having a need and needing help is not a sign that you’re weak. It’s a sign that you’re human.”

— Kate Northrup

Does this sound familiar? If so, you’re going to love what follows. You’re about to discover uplifting stories about the power and relief of enlisting help.

I invited a marvelous group of colleagues to share their personal experiences. They describe their time to ask-for-help indicators and the value of listening to those cues. These generous friends include Diane Quintana, Ellen Delap, Janet Barclay, Janet Schiesl, Jonda Beattie, Julie Bestry, Kara Cutruzulla, Sara Skillen, Seana Turner, and Yota Schneider.

My deepest gratitude goes to this inspiring group for sharing their time, hearts, and wisdom with us. I asked them to respond to and elaborate on this prompt . . .

Describe one indicator that it’s time to ask for help.

10 Best Reasons to Ask for Help

Help Indicator #1: Annoyances

“The best indicator that you should seek help is when others call attention to how often (or for how long) you've mentioned a problem. Whether it’s a tech kerfuffle or health concern, a household area in disarray, or a financial hiccup, we may not notice how much we tolerate repeated annoyances. We get used to jerry-rigged computer solutions or an aching back, sagging closet shelves, or mystery fees. But when friends or colleagues reflect back to us that we’ve repeatedly referenced a frustration that we haven't made the effort to solve, it's a clue that it's time to seek professional guidance or outside support.”

Julie Bestry, CPO® – Certified Professional Organizer, Productivity Specialist, Author &  Blogger

Help Indicator #2: Prioritization

“A solid indicator of needing help is when I’m feeling what I call ‘locked up.’ It’s challenging for me to prioritize. I start making weird little mistakes, and I’m exhausted. Physically, it feels like I’m surrounded by invisible walls. I try to get ahead of it and affirm that it’s not only acceptable to reach out for support but imperative. As someone who’s been a solopreneur for years (wearing all the hats!), now transitioning into a role with lovely people happy to help me, it’s fun - if a bit strange - to recognize I don’t have to do everything alone.”

Sara Skillen, PCC, COLC, CPO® – Director of Education, Coach, Author & Blogger

Help Indicator #3: Task Completion

“One indicator of when to ask for help is when you struggle to complete a task that you used to do easily.

In my case, I used to trim all the bushes along the front of our house. I own a power trimmer, and while trimming isn't glamorous, I was quite able to get the job done. Over the years, in spite of my trimming, the various bushes have grown, requiring me to reach higher and higher to trim the tops of the bushes. Last year, I realized that I could no longer reach high enough. I considered climbing a stool to trim the bushes, but the weight of the trimmer was hard to balance. I finally acknowledged that the job had gotten beyond my ability and brought in a third party. Yes, it cost me a bit of money, but in the end, it was the wisest, safest, and most efficient solution. 

Seana Turner – Professional Organizer and Productivity Coach

Help Indicator #4: Technology

“I know it's time to ask for help when a task takes longer than I can reasonably bill for, especially if it’s due to technical issues beyond my expertise. Recently, I added an event calendar to a client’s website, but the registration buttons weren’t working. Instead of agonizing over it, I contacted my tech support team, and the problem was fixed in under 15 minutes. Having access to experts who can help in various areas—both business and personal—saves time and reduces stress.” 

Janet Barclay – Certified Care Plans Specialist, Website Caregiver & Designer

Help Indicator #5: Emergencies

“When my clients first reach out to me for help, I often hear the expression, ‘so overwhelmed.’ I recently experienced that feeling myself. My husband had a medical emergency that landed him – and me by his side – in the ICU with no idea of how many days we would be there. For me to give him my full attention, I knew it was time to ask for help from my tribe. What burdens they lifted from me!”

 Jonda Beattie – Professional Organizer

Help Indicator #6: No Progress

“It’s time to ask for help when I remain stuck, even after reviewing the problem and creating a plan for moving forward. If I’ve done all that work and still can’t progress, I am confident I need support and will get help.

My current problem is creating and implementing a marketing plan. I am a professional organizer and a former primary school teacher, but I do not have a business background, even though I manage and run my business. It has taken many failed attempts at marketing the different aspects of my business to get me to accept that I need hands-on help. 

Diane N. Quintana, CPO-CD®, CPO® – Certified Professional Organizer, ADHD Organizing Specialist, Author & Blogger

“It’s time to ask for help when I remain stuck.”

— Diane N. Quintana

Help Indicator #7: Collaboration

“I am a born collaborator! Any task has better results and is more fun when I collaborate. Also, I know it is time to enlist help when I have reached my final level of skill and know the project needs a tweak.

An example of this is opening my Etsy shop with new content. I reached a point where I knew that the e-book needed sparkle for effective marketing and professional appeal. Fortunately, I had identified an amazing collaborator with great design skills and knowledge of opening a shop. Enlisting help not only improved the end product but also made the process run smoothly. Having this positive experience also helps me know that this is the right decision to ask for help in the future.”

Ellen Delap, CPO® – Certified Professional Organizer

Help Indicator #8: Heavy Lifting

"Asking for help and getting the help we need the way we need it can be complicated. I was wired and conditioned to be self-reliant and independent, and I like to know how things work and how to fix them. Also, specific projects provide the creative outlet I need. Still, depending on the nature, goal, and cost of a project, certain things are better addressed by those who know what they are doing. As an example, this comes to mind.

When the pandemic hit, we invited our daughter to move back home with us. Her office in New York City, where she lived, had closed, and it made no sense to stay there. Until then, we used to do the heavy lifting whenever our daughters needed to move. This time, we hired a friend and professional mover to help. The experience was not only less stressful but almost enjoyable. Could we have done it ourselves? Sure, but it would have taken much more time and placed undue stress and burden on our bodies."

 Yota Schneider, Certified Seasons of Change® Master Coach –Retreats Facilitator & Blogger

Help Indicator #9: Overwhelm

“I know it's time to ask for help when I feel overwhelmed, and sometimes it sneaks up on me. Recently, my mom's health deteriorated, which has caused many changes - big life events. As the organized sibling, I usually take the lead when things happen with Mom, but recently, I've been overwhelmed as things get added to the list of to-dos. I start worrying that I'm dropping the ball on something important.

Asking for help from my siblings and my husband has helped. We each take on tasks that fit into our schedules and lines of expertise. Keeping the lines of communication open through a text thread and phone calls is key to our efforts. We all want what's best for Mom, so my indicator of when it's time to ask for help is when I feel overwhelmed.

Janet Schiesl, CPO® – Professional Organizer, Owner of Basic Organization

Help Indicator #10: Perspective Shift

“I’ve been noticing a specific sensation: when I feel like I’m staring down a long, dark hallway without doors, it’s a sign my work or creative project is trapped in tunnel vision. I’m stuck asking, ‘How do I do this?’ when I should ask, ‘Who can help me do this?’ This reframing nudges me to clearly define my needs and the people who can help. Quickly, a new ‘who’ can illuminate the path, offer guidance, or simply encourage you to keep going – and suddenly, doors can appear.”

Kara Cutruzulla – Author, Lyricist & Project Coach

When did you recently ask for help? What benefits did you experience? I’d love to hear your thoughts. I invite you to join the conversation.

If you feel stuck or overwhelmed and want to get organized, I’m here to help. I love supporting my clients in making progress. Contact me, Linda, at linda@ohsoorganized.com, call 914-271-5643, or schedule a Discovery Call. Your goals are attainable, especially with support.

What happens when you have so many possibilities? Do you feel overwhelmed? Do you get stuck? Are you unable to make decisions or take action? It’s terrific to have options and know there are lots of possibilities. However, when the scope is too large, the choices can feel more like a burden than an inspiration.

Last week, I attended the ICD conference near Boston with over 100 organizing colleagues from around the globe. It felt amazing to be together in person again, be with my colleagues, and meet new friends. We learned from incredible experts during seven 90-minute sessions. It was wonderful, intense, and emotional. There were sessions about dementia, hoarding, neurodiversity, ADHD, anxiety, time management, and mindset.

By the end, my brain felt drippy, like a sponge that couldn’t absorb more liquid. Of course, I want to share everything I learned with you. As I sat to write this, I got overwhelmed by the options and possibilities. So, guess what? I’m dialing it back from my 16 pages of notes to share information from five of the sessions. I hope the ideas open up something for you- a new perspective, reframe, or possibility.

5 Powerful Ways Learning Encourages Possibilities

1. DEMENTIA | “I am who I am. I’m just different.”

Beth Nolan, PhD, the Director of Research and Policy for Teepa Snow’s Positive Approach to Care™ (PAC), said there are 100+ causes and types of dementia. One way to help is to understand while dementia “robs” the person of many things, they still have skills and strengths. Identify and focus on those.

My mom was diagnosed with vascular dementia in 2013 and passed away in 2021. While many of her abilities were compromised over those eight years, I was always inspired by what remained, like her ability to make music, play the piano, sing, and express love. She was still my mom, just different.

2. HOARDING | “Hoarding isn’t just a house problem. It’s a mental health problem.”

Dr. David Tolin, the Founder and Director of the Anxiety Disorders Center at the Institute for Living and Adjunct Professor of Psychiatry at Yale University School of Medicine, said Hoarding Disorder became a standalone diagnosis in the 2013 DSM-5. The hallmarks of the disorder are having difficulty discarding or parting with possessions and having a visible manifestation of clutter build up with the home no longer useable for its intended purpose.

For people with Hoarding Disorder, “Saving happens because tossing is distressing, not liberating or freeing.”

Dr. Tolin shared these statistics:

• The drive to acquire and save affects 2-5% of the population worldwide.

• Hoarding Disorder is twice as common as Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (OCD).

• Hoarding Disorder begins at a young age (6-16) and worsens with age. It does not get better on its own.

While Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) is one of the most successful treatment methods for Hoarding Disorder, it is not 100% effective. Through continuing research, Dr. Tolin is committed to better understanding the psychology and biology of hoarding behavior and discovering ways to boost CBT’s efficacy.

“Saving happens because tossing is distressing, not liberating or freeing.”

— Dr. David Tolin

3. NEURODIVERSITY | “The value of life can’t and shouldn’t be based on productivity. It leaves a lot of people out.”

Devon Price, PhD, a social psychologist, professor, researcher, author, and proud Autistic person, was diagnosed with autism after finishing his PhD and experiencing “autistic burnout.”

Some of autism’s distinguishing characteristics include sensory input challenges, such as loud sounds and eye contact, which are painful. Processing is slower, but it’s a strength because they catch small details and are more detail-oriented. However, because the world moves fast, it doesn’t support how they process, so they feel more disabled.

Devon prefers identity-first language- “autistic person,” “autistic,” and “disabled person.” He said to avoid “differently abled” or “special needs.”

4. ADHD | “Successful ADHD women look successful on the outside and feel inadequate on the inside.”

Linda Roggli, PCC, creator of the ADHD Palooza series, a Professional Certified Coach, and author and founder of the A-D-Diva Network for ADHD women 40-and-better said she has an “ADHD brain.” 

The ADHD inattentive type is most prevalent in women. Some distinguishing factors include a busy brain, low energy, high worry, inability to concentrate, being distracted by one’s thoughts, daydreaming, difficulty following through and prioritizing, misplacing things, being talkative, impatient, having low self-esteem, not having great a working memory, making impulsive decisions, and feeling restless.

Roggli said understanding the impact of hormones on women with ADHD is essential. The brain works better with more estrogen. Estrogen affects dopamine. The ADHD brain lacks dopamine. Menopause decreases estrogen by 50% and keeps getting lower.

Most women with ADHD have comorbid conditions or “sidecars.” They include:

• 30-40% - 1 Depressive episode

• 50% - Learning differences

• 10-20% Bipolar

• 30% OCD

• Up to 50% - Addictions

5. ANXIETY | “The more you care, the more you worry. Anxiety means I care. You can’t teach people not to care. You can only teach how to manage anxiety.”

Dr. Alicia Clark, a psychologist and author of Hack Your Anxiety, said 40% of people experience persistent stress, and only 36% get help. She also said:

• Women suffer from anxiety 1.6 times more than men.

• Post-pandemic, anxiety and depression increased by three times.

• The visual distraction of clutter increases cognitive overload and decreases working memory.

Anxiety shows up in the “emotional landscape” of the organizing work we do with our clients. These can appear as fear of change, failure, facing emotional memory of things, letting go, and making mistakes.

Dr. Clark described four forms of anxiety – Whisper, Chatter, Nagging, and Yelling. She explained they are not all bad. Chatter anxiety is referred to as “good stress.” You can reframe anxiety and recognize that it drives motivation. She suggests using “anxiety to change what is in your control,” focusing on progress, reframing setbacks as part of the growth process, and getting adequate sleep.

Possibilities open up when we understand more about our psychological, emotional, and biological states. I was deeply moved by the presenters, the stories and insights they shared, and how they connected to many of my clients. It is a privilege to be part of their journey. I have the utmost respect and admiration for my clients’ determination and how they face their challenges.

What possibilities appeared for you? Did you discover any surprises? I’d love to hear your thoughts. I invite you to join the conversation.

The newest installment (v35) of the “What’s Interesting?” feature has my latest finds informing, educating, and relating to organizing and life balance. These unique, inspiring, time-related discoveries reflect this month’s blog theme.

You are a generous, communicative, and engaged group. I am deeply grateful for your presence, positive energy, and contributions to this community. I look forward to your participation and additions to the collection I’ve sourced.

What do you find interesting?

What’s Interesting? – 5 Best Time-Related Discoveries

1. Interesting Read – Slow Time

Does life feel hectic? Are your days overfilled with endless commitments and to-dos?  In Seeking Slow – Reclaim Moments of Calm in Your Day, writer and photographer Melanie Barnes shares her philosophy and practices of “slow living.”  It’s “a lifestyle that encourages a slower rhythm and values a mindful approach…It is about intentionally doing things and being present for each part of our day.”

This small, beautifully designed book encompasses living in a digital age, managing our time, creating a slow home, establishing slow-living rituals, and more. Barnes emphasizes, “Time is a resource that we simply cannot get back. Once it has gone, it is gone.”

Thoughtful questions include:

• How can we use our time in a way that makes our lives meaningful?

• What are we here for?

• What is our purpose?

• What is important to us?

• What are our priorities?

2. Interesting Product – List Time

If you are easily overwhelmed by your daily tasks, Today’s Plan of Attack 4”x6” sticky notes by Knock Knock will help focus your thoughts and time. The categories and allotted space on the pad encourage a realistic approach to your day.

Organize them by what’s “most critical,” “would be nice,” or “not a chance.” Planning and prioritizing your tasks will give your day better flow and more satisfaction.

“Time is a resource that we simply cannot get back.”

— Melanie Barnes

3. Interesting Article  – Productivity Time

In the “Your Productive Brain” article in BBC Science Focus, neuroscientist, author, and comedian Dr. Dean Burnett shares his best and worst productivity tips. He identifies which productivity strategies are myths versus ones that work and are backed by science. For example, it is a myth that waking at 4am will make you more productive. However, waking up when you’ve had a sufficient sleep is more advantageous (and productivity-inducing) than waking at 4am.

Other science-based productivity tips include listening to “some sort of background noise,” incorporating greenery in your workplace, exercising regularly, and eating healthfully. These have a positive influence on how our brain functions and result in boosting productivity. What enhances your productivity?

4. Interesting Resource – Reflection Time

FutureMe is a simple, surprising, and powerful resource. Go to their website to write a custom letter to yourself. It will be delivered by email at a future designated time you choose. Reflect and engage with time to send a positive message, capture a significant moment, create accountability around a goal, or share a challenge. You decide your message’s content, purpose, and delivery schedule. What a fascinating way to live in the present while touching the future. What message will you send to your future self?

5. Interesting Thought – Happy Time

As we transition from one season to the next, focus on being productive, and organizing your life, don’t neglect to make time for those things that bring you joy and happiness.

Over the last few weekends, I had some “make your soul happy” times. Exploring new places, meandering in nature, spending time with my husband and kids, eating special and delicious meals, walking along the High Line, and seeing “The Music Man” on Broadway helped restore and replenish my being. Making time to do things that make you happy isn’t frivolous. It’s essential to your wellbeing. What’s on your list?

What are your interesting time discoveries? Which of these resonate with you? I’d love to hear your thoughts. I invite you to join the conversation.

Many of my virtual organizing clients are overwhelmed by clutter, so they reach out for help. One of the common threads is the sense they need to postpone all fun and joy until they completely declutter. In truth, it’s challenging to work intensely without taking a break or replenishing your reserves. Having joy-infused counterbalances to organizing can bring renewed energy and focus.

Earlier this week, I had an Executive Mom Nest meeting where we talked about ways to prioritize joy. Transformational Coach Advisor Leesa Askew gave us a writing exercise to list 20 things that bring us joy. They didn’t have to be big things. Our lists mainly focused on simple stuff. Some of mine included:

• Taking that first sip of coffee in the morning 

• Walking in nature

• Walking with a friend

• Writing in my journal

• Being at the beach

• Sitting in the sun

• Taking photos

• Talking with our kids

• Smelling the lilacs

At the end of the meeting, we were encouraged to select one item from our joy list and commit to doing it that day. I knew right away which one to choose- smelling the lilacs! As their blooming season is short, I didn’t want to miss the opportunity to take in their intoxicating scent.

While running errands, I had driven past this gorgeous blooming bush of lilacs several times. I thought, “Linda, stop the car, get out, and smell them.”  However, in the interest of getting things done, I kept driving. Or, I chose to postpone this simple moment of joy to do other things. Does that sound familiar? Have you ever decided not to have fun or lean into a special moment because you were preoccupied with something else?

After the prioritizing joy conversation, I made an intentional trip to the lilacs. When I arrived, I parked my car and walked down the block. I leaned over, placed my nose close to the lavender flowers, took a deep breath, and let the fragrance flood my senses. It was a happy moment.

“Prioritizing joy and decluttering aren’t mutually exclusive.”

— Linda Samuels, CPO-CD®, CVPO

For you, joy might come in other forms. Instead of nature, lilacs, and sun, you might prefer a coffee date with a friend, curling up with a good book, or eating by candlelight. The possibilities abound. You can simultaneously prioritize decluttering, organizing, or any large project and engage in joyous moments. Prioritizing joy and decluttering aren’t mutually exclusive. In fact, prioritizing regular encounters with delight will help you approach the challenging parts of your day with clarity and perspective.

Do you postpone fun and joy when you’re feeling overwhelmed by clutter? What brings you joy? What overwhelms you? I’d love to hear your thoughts. I invite you to join the conversation.