What happens when you have so many possibilities? Do you feel overwhelmed? Do you get stuck? Are you unable to make decisions or take action? It’s terrific to have options and know there are lots of possibilities. However, when the scope is too large, the choices can feel more like a burden than an inspiration.

Last week, I attended the ICD conference near Boston with over 100 organizing colleagues from around the globe. It felt amazing to be together in person again, be with my colleagues, and meet new friends. We learned from incredible experts during seven 90-minute sessions. It was wonderful, intense, and emotional. There were sessions about dementia, hoarding, neurodiversity, ADHD, anxiety, time management, and mindset.

By the end, my brain felt drippy, like a sponge that couldn’t absorb more liquid. Of course, I want to share everything I learned with you. As I sat to write this, I got overwhelmed by the options and possibilities. So, guess what? I’m dialing it back from my 16 pages of notes to share information from five of the sessions. I hope the ideas open up something for you- a new perspective, reframe, or possibility.

5 Powerful Ways Learning Encourages Possibilities

1. DEMENTIA | “I am who I am. I’m just different.”

Beth Nolan, PhD, the Director of Research and Policy for Teepa Snow’s Positive Approach to Care™ (PAC), said there are 100+ causes and types of dementia. One way to help is to understand while dementia “robs” the person of many things, they still have skills and strengths. Identify and focus on those.

My mom was diagnosed with vascular dementia in 2013 and passed away in 2021. While many of her abilities were compromised over those eight years, I was always inspired by what remained, like her ability to make music, play the piano, sing, and express love. She was still my mom, just different.

2. HOARDING | “Hoarding isn’t just a house problem. It’s a mental health problem.”

Dr. David Tolin, the Founder and Director of the Anxiety Disorders Center at the Institute for Living and Adjunct Professor of Psychiatry at Yale University School of Medicine, said Hoarding Disorder became a standalone diagnosis in the 2013 DSM-5. The hallmarks of the disorder are having difficulty discarding or parting with possessions and having a visible manifestation of clutter build up with the home no longer useable for its intended purpose.

For people with Hoarding Disorder, “Saving happens because tossing is distressing, not liberating or freeing.”

Dr. Tolin shared these statistics:

• The drive to acquire and save affects 2-5% of the population worldwide.

• Hoarding Disorder is twice as common as Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (OCD).

• Hoarding Disorder begins at a young age (6-16) and worsens with age. It does not get better on its own.

While Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) is one of the most successful treatment methods for Hoarding Disorder, it is not 100% effective. Through continuing research, Dr. Tolin is committed to better understanding the psychology and biology of hoarding behavior and discovering ways to boost CBT’s efficacy.

“Saving happens because tossing is distressing, not liberating or freeing.”

— Dr. David Tolin

3. NEURODIVERSITY | “The value of life can’t and shouldn’t be based on productivity. It leaves a lot of people out.”

Devon Price, PhD, a social psychologist, professor, researcher, author, and proud Autistic person, was diagnosed with autism after finishing his PhD and experiencing “autistic burnout.”

Some of autism’s distinguishing characteristics include sensory input challenges, such as loud sounds and eye contact, which are painful. Processing is slower, but it’s a strength because they catch small details and are more detail-oriented. However, because the world moves fast, it doesn’t support how they process, so they feel more disabled.

Devon prefers identity-first language- “autistic person,” “autistic,” and “disabled person.” He said to avoid “differently abled” or “special needs.”

4. ADHD | “Successful ADHD women look successful on the outside and feel inadequate on the inside.”

Linda Roggli, PCC, creator of the ADHD Palooza series, a Professional Certified Coach, and author and founder of the A-D-Diva Network for ADHD women 40-and-better said she has an “ADHD brain.” 

The ADHD inattentive type is most prevalent in women. Some distinguishing factors include a busy brain, low energy, high worry, inability to concentrate, being distracted by one’s thoughts, daydreaming, difficulty following through and prioritizing, misplacing things, being talkative, impatient, having low self-esteem, not having great a working memory, making impulsive decisions, and feeling restless.

Roggli said understanding the impact of hormones on women with ADHD is essential. The brain works better with more estrogen. Estrogen affects dopamine. The ADHD brain lacks dopamine. Menopause decreases estrogen by 50% and keeps getting lower.

Most women with ADHD have comorbid conditions or “sidecars.” They include:

• 30-40% - 1 Depressive episode

• 50% - Learning differences

• 10-20% Bipolar

• 30% OCD

• Up to 50% - Addictions

5. ANXIETY | “The more you care, the more you worry. Anxiety means I care. You can’t teach people not to care. You can only teach how to manage anxiety.”

Dr. Alicia Clark, a psychologist and author of Hack Your Anxiety, said 40% of people experience persistent stress, and only 36% get help. She also said:

• Women suffer from anxiety 1.6 times more than men.

• Post-pandemic, anxiety and depression increased by three times.

• The visual distraction of clutter increases cognitive overload and decreases working memory.

Anxiety shows up in the “emotional landscape” of the organizing work we do with our clients. These can appear as fear of change, failure, facing emotional memory of things, letting go, and making mistakes.

Dr. Clark described four forms of anxiety – Whisper, Chatter, Nagging, and Yelling. She explained they are not all bad. Chatter anxiety is referred to as “good stress.” You can reframe anxiety and recognize that it drives motivation. She suggests using “anxiety to change what is in your control,” focusing on progress, reframing setbacks as part of the growth process, and getting adequate sleep.

Possibilities open up when we understand more about our psychological, emotional, and biological states. I was deeply moved by the presenters, the stories and insights they shared, and how they connected to many of my clients. It is a privilege to be part of their journey. I have the utmost respect and admiration for my clients’ determination and how they face their challenges.

What possibilities appeared for you? Did you discover any surprises? I’d love to hear your thoughts. I invite you to join the conversation.

It’s fascinating how big changes are made. They start with small, almost unnoticeable habit shifts. On your journey to be free of clutter, you donate a bag of rarely worn clothes or edit and clear the pile of unsorted mail from your kitchen counter. These tiny, single actions can bring about significant changes when consistency and support are added to your effort. 

The other aspect of making meaningful changes is the need for time and mental energy to make them happen. When you’re preoccupied, running as fast as you can to keep up, or emotionally exhausted, change is the last thing on your mind. You can’t stop your life to make a change. Instead, to integrate new habits, it’s essential to create space in your life for prioritizing the change you desire. 

In the last several years, I’ve experienced many emotional energy pulls. These included taking care of my mom with dementia, saying my final good-byes to her last March, grieving, navigating the pandemic’s effects on my organizing business, and preparing for and having our youngest daughter’s wedding at our home during the pandemic. Despite these emotional highs and lows, I’ve found focused intervals to bring about changes in my life. Admittedly, many of these changes came into being when I had more mental energy to give them.

Coincidentally, the three anchors/words, which rhyme, kept me motivated and focused on my desired changes. They are Zoom, Noom, and Room.

While these specific ideas might not be on your change radar, I encourage you to consider which words are. Which anchors will help you pursue the changes you seek? How will you make the space and time for change to flourish?

3 Hopeful Ideas Motivated Big Changes in My Life Which Can Help You Too

1. Zoom

Communication, relationships, and community are some of my treasured values. When the pandemic arrived, many communication networks halted. Most in-person contact was suspended. I couldn’t visit with family, friends, colleagues, or clients. Sure I still had the phone, text, and email, but physical contact was limited and non-existent for extended periods.

Using Zoom became an incredible go-to tool that helped me slowly change and think about how I interacted, did business, and stayed socially active. I’m guessing that many of you are Zoomed-out, but for me, Zoom continues to be a viable way for navigating life and keeping connected with people. 

I embraced communication changes and used Zoom to-

• Have bimonthly family meetings aka ‘SamFam Zoom’

• Host parties and gatherings for cocktails, New Year’s Eve, and Thanksgiving

• Attend comedy events, yoga class, Shivas, Seders, religious services, retreats, cook-offs, bonfires, and breakfasts

• Enjoy virtual ‘coffee dates’ with family and friends

• Continue my professional development

• Add to my certifications becoming a Certified Virtual Professional Organizer (CVPO™)

• Engage in organizing conferences, business meetings, and networking

• Present organizing workshops

• Pivot my business and help clients through virtual organizing

Zoom provided a channel to nurture and develop relationships, shift my organizing business, learn, and teach. While most in-person activities are now possible as many pandemic restrictions lift, Zoom still remains a viable way for me to stay connected. The platform allowed me to be flexible during these last few years, quickly embrace change, and support what I value most.

2.  Noom

Being healthy is a top priority for me. While I had some healthy practices like meditating daily and eating lots of fruits and vegetables, I wanted to change other habits. For what seems like a bazillion years, one of my goals has been to ‘lose 10 pounds.’ I’ve never been a dieter and didn’t like the idea of going on a diet. Instead, about five years ago, I saw a tremendously helpful nutritionist. She gave me a better understanding of what foods and portions were best for me. Over eight months, I lost 15 pounds. But then, in time, I gained it back and more.  The ongoing support was vital, and the difference was noticeable when I stopped seeing her.

Do you remember how I spoke about having the time and mental energy to bring about change? It takes focused effort to make eating and other lifestyle changes. When my mom died, I was emotionally exhausted. It took me months to get my energy back. When it returned, I felt ready to refocus on my health and make some changes.

In September, I signed up for Noom. It’s a weight loss app with a psychology-based approach to “help you change not just how you eat, but how you think.” It’s well-designed and simple to use. The app with built-in accountability helps me keep daily food logs, understand my calorie budget, track water intake, daily exercise, and weight. You are assigned a personal Coach and receive short articles every day, which encourage, motivate, and explain the psychology of habits.

While I’m still working towards my target goal, in five months, I have lost 18.5 pounds, I’m drinking 9 glasses of water a day, and walking an average of 10,000 steps a day. There have been other changes such as losing many inches around my body, clothing fitting better, feeling more energetic, learning new skills, and knowing I have a doable life-changing plan that’s working.

A bonus surprise was my husband signed up for Noom with me. He’s made incredible changes, and I’m so proud of him. We support one another, which is invaluable.

With any significant life change, it’s essential to have ongoing support, whether an app, person, Coach or all of those. If you’re curious about Noom, click here to learn more.

What do you need to bring about the habit changes you desire?

“Big changes start with small actions.”

— Linda Samuels, CPO-CD®, CVPO™

3. Room

This last idea is about creating both physical and mental space in your life to feel calm, have room to think, and live with less stress. These changes were worth pursuing, and I have worked years to get there. For me, there is the physical manifestation, which comes in the form of an uncluttered home filled with colors, textures, and scents that soothe and delight. 

One of the goals I worked on last summer into fall, inspired by our vacation staying in a tiny house, was my ‘live with less’ project. While I had lots of stuff, I recognized I didn’t need or want it all. I started randomly going through drawers, closets, and files to let go of unnecessary things. It was cathartic and surprising how much stuff exited. I don’t miss anything.

The other part of ‘room’ is making space for your mental well-being. For me, that’s having quiet time, finding cozy spots to write, journal, or read, spending time in nature, exploring and photographing, meditating, or doing yoga. It’s making room for self-care and carving out time to feed my soul.

Especially with all that has happened in the world and the ongoing challenges, making time to replenish yourself is critical. It’s all too easy to get derailed by a crisis near or far. Our bodies are not designed to sustain continual stress.

What would it take to make room for you? What changes will help make room and space for your physical and emotional well-being?

Big changes start with small actions. What will be your anchors for change? What will provide motivation and support for the changes you desire? I’d love to hear your thoughts. I invite you to join the conversation.

Last week I introduced you to my simple organizing plan experiment. I continue to let go and learn with five more discoveries to share. This low-pressure, loose plan will help me reduce the amount of stuff I own. A daily repeat on my to-do list cues me to ‘Edit & release some stuff.’  There is no expectation other than to do something. I spend 15-60 minutes editing what I feel like working on that day.

Even though our house isn’t cluttered and items have a ‘home,’ I own things that have overstayed their welcome and are no longer used, needed, or wanted. They are taking up physical and emotional space. It’s time to let them go.

This past week, my adventure continued. I edited and organized plastic containers, tea, the cobalt blue glass collection, office and school supplies, wrapping paper, personal and business papers from files and notebooks, medicine cabinets, toiletries, personal care products, and my email inbox. These items were from the kitchen, pantry, dining room, office, guest and main bathrooms, linen closet, and computer.

I let go of . . .

• Four 13-gallon bags of trash

• Three bags of paper for recycling

• One bag of paper for shredding

• One bag of school supplies for a friend

• Hundreds of emails with inbox now hovering at around 35

This low-pressure do-something-every-day-plan is working well. I previously shared seven lessons learned. My discoveries continue, and I added five new ones.

5 More Discoveries I Made With My Simple Organizing Plan

1. Find the Treasures

I didn’t set out for the decluttering process to be a treasure hunt. My focus was on finding the things I no longer wanted. To my delight, I found some jewels. No. They weren’t precious stones but were messages and remembrances from other stages. These papers affirmed the time and energy investments in my family, business, and professional development. My favorite find was from notes I wrote during a family meeting with my mom before her dementia diagnosis. She said,

“There isn’t a thing, a book, an anything I need beyond you guys and Daddy.” 

Mom valued time over stuff and people over things. What beautiful thoughts to discover at that moment. On my letting go quest, I felt my mom’s love, clarity, and encouraging support. As you edit, be on the lookout for your treasures.

2. Embrace the Easy

When you edit, some categories will be a challenge. I’ll explore more about those soon. However, other items will be effortless to decide about. They are the no-brainers. When editing the bathrooms, I found expired over-the-counter medicines. The decision to toss them was simple. Out they went. In my office, I found my old Rolodex. I hadn’t referenced it in over 15 years, and the contacts had been transferred to my digital system. It was easy and only a little painful to say “Good-bye, friend.” When I sorted the bazillion tea bags and discovered ones that no one will ever use, I let them go with no deliberation.

All of these categories were non-controversial and not emotional. And you know what? I embraced the simplicity of those choices. There was no guilt, no second-guessing, just this beautiful ease in letting go.

“There was no guilt, no second-guessing, just this beautiful ease in letting go.”

— Linda Samuels, CPO-CD®, CVPO™

3. Allow for Space

While I let go of stuff every day, the physical volume that left this past week was less than the prior weeks. I’m getting to the more complicated, time-intensive things like papers and items with stronger emotional attachments. For example, it was difficult going through my mom’s papers since she died just four months ago. I let go of some things in my “first pass.” I gifted myself space to create some distance. When I’m ready, I’ll return at a future time for the second and possibly third round of letting go. 

I recognize that while I want to let go of many things, I may not be ready to let go of everything at once. And that’s OK. In fact, making several passes supports the low-pressure nature of the ‘Edit & release some stuff’ plan.

4. Just Show Up

Every day is different, with some more full or demanding of my energy. Despite the variables, I remain committed to editing and releasing every day. During one recent full-plate day, I had twenty minutes before I had to pick up our take-out order. Instead of starting my writing project, I used that time to work on my organizing plan. In twenty minutes, I edited and shredded a stack of papers. I checked off the task on my to-do list and felt the endorphin ping. It was a win. 

5. Inspire and Be Inspired

Inspiring cues with summer changing to fall are all around- a cooler day here, a yellow leaf there. Over these weeks, as I’ve shared my organizing process with others, something else extraordinary is happening. Clients, friends, family, and colleagues are supportive and feel inspired by my plan. They recognize that it’s doable and straightforward. How exciting to encourage and inspire people to engage in living with less.

People are also telling me about their completed or ongoing letting go experiences. They’re sharing their successes and challenges. This inspires me to keep going. I’m not alone in my quest for less. We’re in this together.

Do you have an editing story? Are you working on living with less? What helps you? Which discoveries resonate with you? I’d love to hear your thoughts. I invite you to join the conversation.

In my life and the organizing work, I do with clients, letting go can be accompanied by loss and intense emotions. Loss can be of a loved one, a move away from a treasured home, a change in family structure, or a job.

Even when a change is something we want, letting go of what was, is inevitable. Because without letting go, we cannot move forward and remain stuck in the past. For some, letting go can be freeing. For others, the process is painful. It depends on the person and circumstance.

Letting Go Slowly

My mom died last month. I’ve been thinking a lot about the ways I’ve had to let go in these years. There has been letting go of her as her dementia worsened, along with the physical stuff that she owned. About four years ago, we moved mom from her home of almost 60 years into a memory care unit in an assisted living facility. At that time, I cleared out and sold her house. This was the home I grew up in and that our family gathered in for almost six decades. 

There was so much letting go that happened then. While the family wanted many of my parents’ belongings, there were many things they didn’t take. The leftovers were sold, recycled, donated, or discarded. We let go of the house contents and then the actual house. It was necessary, but I felt a profound loss and shift. 

More Letting Go

By the time I moved my mom into The Ambassador, her possessions fit into the contents of one room. She had just what she needed. No more. No less. I decorated her room before moving in so she would feel comfortable being surrounded by her favorite art, music, family photos, and piano.

After she died, I cleared out her room. It struck me how simple the process was compared to clearing out her home. The most challenging work I already did. But I noticed something interesting. While I had loving offers from my husband and kids to help pack up her room, I needed to do it myself. For me, part of letting go included touching her things one last time. I carefully packed up the framed pictures. I washed and gently folded her clothes before passing them on. For so many years, I had taken care of my mom and all of her things. I wanted to give them one last loving touch goodbye as I packed them up and routed them to family or the donation place.

“Letting go requires patience, time, readiness, and space to get there.”

— Linda Samuels, CPO-CD®, CVPO™

Balancing Loss

Grief isn’t something you get over. It’s something you live with that never entirely goes away but varies in intensity. I said earlier that one reason we let go is so we can move forward. And I get that. I believe that. But I also know that letting go requires patience, time, readiness, and space to get there. To help balance the emotions and grief, I’ve spent a lot of time these past weeks taking walks, resting, meditating, writing, talking with family and friends, getting fresh air, noticing the spring flowers, and being in the woods or near water. These help me focus on the present, reflect on the past, slowly let go, and move on. 

Some types of letting go are more energizing. This one, losing my mom and wrapping up her life, feels different. I’m being gentle with myself as I continue letting go, handle the remaining details of mom’s life, and find my way forward.

Is letting go a challenge for you? Does it feel different when it is accompanied by loss? What helps you let go? I’d love to hear your thoughts. I invite you to join the conversation.