How resilient are you at bouncing back after life throws you a curve ball? These surprises come in degress of magnitude from minor setbacks to the profound. They vary from losing our keys to being so distracted that we put our sneakers in the freezer to having a loved one rushed to the hospital, or pass away. Last week’s post, 5 Success Tips for Life’s Surprises, generated an interesting conversation about bouncing back, which begged to be explored further. I invited several of my wonderful colleagues and regular blog participators (Helena Alkhas, Janet Barclay, Ellen Delap, Leslie Josel, Janice Russell, Yota Schneider, Geralin Thomas, and Sue West) to continue this idea and share with you their best success tips for getting back on track after “stuff” happens. My gratitude goes to each of them for their generous and valuable words of wisdom.

8 Tips for Bouncing Back

1. Relax

"Not all crises are created equal! More often than not, when we find ourselves in the grip of the unexpected, what can help us the most, is allowing for breathing space! Relaxing into a situation can activate our creative thinking and the law of synchronicity. 

Things have a way of falling into place - just the way they're meant to - when we're able to take a step back, breathe, and open up to guidance. From that place, we can evaluate our options, reach out to our support system, and respond from a place of clarity, resourcefulness, and conviction."

Yota Schneider, Life Transitions Coach

2. Respect Self

“I believe that resilience is a funny thing. Unfortunately, there are no absolutes to bouncing back when life hands you a curve ball.  Sometimes, we jump right back in stronger than ever while other times we need to move more slowly to resume our every day.  And I think that is the best way to approach those times. If you are aware, truly aware of what you need – time, quiet, friends, exercise or even just a refreshing ice tea to reset you – and you do it on your own terms in your own way, then the bouncing back will surely come.”

Leslie Josel, Professional Organizer

3. Make No Excuses

“If you want to ‘reboot’ yourself and recover gracefully just stop making excuses for almost anything and almost everything! Make a decision to rarely give an excuse again unless you are point-blank asked to do so or it's absolutely necessary and then, do it as truthfully as possible.”

Geralin Thomas, CPO-CD & Organizing Instructor

4. Activate Healthy Habits

“The ability to bounce back comes from our inner energy reserves. In the most difficult of times we often lose sleep, eat poorly and generally think negative thoughts. However, if we rely on good self care, including healthy habits and positivity, we not only bounce back more quickly, we can also ward off more stress.  This is why a good night’s sleep on a very regular basis is one of my own highest priorities.”

Ellen Delap, Certified Professional Organizer

5. Identify Needs

“An important component of the Minding Your Matters® Flexible Structure Method of organizing and productivity is to select success tools. There are three types of tools: Support, Supplies and Skills. At any given point in life, you may have to employ or shore up one or more of these tools. Understanding that the type and amount you use of each tool varies by circumstance is crucial to navigating the ups and downs of this life.”

Janice Russell, Productivity Strategist

6. Be Proactive

“Sometimes things go wrong due to your own actions or failure to act. Instead of giving up, think of what you can do to prevent it from happening again, then do it – immediately.”

Janet Barclay, Virtual Assistant, Web Designer, & Blogger

7. Draw from Past Successes

“Call it ‘mindfulness,’ ‘awareness,’ ‘observing’ or ‘noticing patterns.’ It’s about using what you know works, for you, not for your spouse or friend.

Find a quiet time and place to reflect. Think about other small or large surprises and changes from your past. Think about how you got back on track. Write down what’s worked for you in the past. If it was a person who helped, what was particularly helpful in what they said or how they said it? Or was it their listening that was most helpful? If you did it yourself, what got you there? What pulled you back?”

Sue West, Certified Organizing Coach & Certified Professional Organizer

8. Evoke Imagery

“To portray bounce back and resilience I use the image of bamboo. It is so tall and majestic, but can bend down to the ground in a storm and slowly, after the storm passes, bring itself up again. That's resilience, the ability to gracefully accept the ‘bending downs’ life brings us and slowly make our way up to the sky again.”

Helena Alkhas, Professional Organizer & Virtual Assistant

Life’s challenges come in varying degrees. When the unexpected happens, it’s useful to have some tools at the ready to increase our chance of successfully navigating forward. Come join the conversation. What is your best go to “bouncing back” tip? 

Time constantly moves, but sometimes we need to be still. We have to just breathe, not do, and quiet ourselves. Vacations provide a wonderful break to do this, but they can be few and far between. What are the benefits of introducing stillness more frequently? With our busy lives, how can we embrace the pause?

On a recent spring weekend afternoon, I basked in the quiet comfort of our hammock. As I stretched out between two giant oak trees, the birds chirped and the breeze barely blew. Restful greens surrounded me. The light blue sky peeked through a ceiling of trees. The hammock swung ever so slightly. I wrote, read, and thought while appreciating the calming effects of the scenery, sounds, and scents.

The benefits of the quiet were noticeable. I slowed down and felt better balanced. That sense of constantly needing to do and accomplish took a hiatus. Feelings of stress and restlessness went away. Energy was restored. Clarity returned to my thoughts. Gratitude for the surroundings, peacefulness, and pause filled my being.

If you don’t have a hammock what are other ways you can experience the pause? Some like to meditate, pray or do yoga. Others prefer being near water, woods, or mountains. Porch or playground swings can be relaxing. There are many ways to quiet the self.

Time is for doing and it's also for just being. What benefit do you get from pausing? What works for you?

Tonight there was no question that my next step was to write this post. I’m long overdue and I could delay no more. That’s how it goes. Sometimes our next step is so clear that there is no debating, procrastinating, or confusion. On the other hand, sometimes that next step isn’t obvious.

Finding the next step has to do with locating where you are. The where I’m referring to is not a specific physical location but your state of mind. Once you know where you are, clarity about “next” can more easily be seen.

In my computer and work area are many small, colorful toys. In addition to this fun collection, I also have a variety of phrases on signs and notes. Recently, I realized that these words help me locate where I am and prompt me towards next. I’d like to share them with you.

6 Next Step Prompts

“Things to do”  - This small metal sign reminds me that next often involves looking at my list. Do I know what’s most important? Have my priorities shifted? Have I been realistic in what can be accomplished on that day? This sign keeps me focused, especially when I’m not sure what to do next.

“Let’s leave worry as a last resort.” – This quote written on an index card is something my Uncle Lew says. Worry is unproductive. When worry starts to creep into my thoughts, this note cues me to shift my focus to something useful.

“I write to understand as much as to be understood.” – This Elie Wiesel quote is printed on a piece of paper. It suggests that sometimes next involves pausing to write and reflect. From this understanding and discovery of where I am, the next step appears.

“There is no end to what we say is getting ready.” – This quote handwritten on a purple sticky note is something my mom said. It means that while preparation is important, we need to recognize when we’ve done enough. Let go of fear and perfection. Take that next step, even if you’re not 100% ready or sure.

“I wish I had treasured the doing a little more and the getting it done a little less.” – This quote by Anna Quindlen stands upright on a small card. It encourages me to appreciate now, next and everything along the way.

“Relax” – These cutout metal letters remind me that I can’t work 24/7. A balanced life means that rest, sleep and not doing are essential. That word says to me, “Linda, it’s time to unwind. It’s time to stop.”

I’d love to hear from you. Come join in the conversation. What helps you find next?

We all experience days that we just love. Today is one of those for me. It’s a Sunday. Life seems quieter, sleepier and more peaceful than usual. The family is around and without any special plans on the agenda other than relaxing and allowing the day to unfold.

This calm was accompanied by the anticipation of the first big snowfall of the winter and the new year that is rapidly approaching. Today’s peaceful feeling was a welcome contrast to this time of year, which is often focused on the angst of change and transition. We make time to let go and unclutter ourselves from stuff, negativity and busy schedules. We evaluate, plan and decide what we want for coming year. There are endings and new beginnings, which can elevate our stress levels.

I find myself sandwiched between these two diverse states of calm and anticipation. I feel happy simply enjoying the here and now, yet excited thinking about the snow and goals for the coming year. I am looking forward to the future while still being grateful for the present.

Around noon, the flurries began ever so slightly. My thoughts became filled with being snowed in and cozy with my family. I imagined cooking together, sipping hot chocolate with marshmallows and just hanging out. My list of plans for 2011 seemed far less important.

There will be plenty of time for planning. There will be plenty of time to prioritize my goals. For this moment in time, I am grateful for the blanket of snow, the family being together, the homemade soup we just shared and the hot chocolate with marshmallows that will soon be enjoyed.

What are you enjoying right now? What are you looking forward to for the coming year?