For almost three decades, I’ve enthusiastically helped people edit and get organized. Recently, I’ve become my own client and leaned into some organizing self-help. My motivation to let go of the extraneous was partially influenced by this summer’s tiny house vacation. While I no longer am obsessed with moving into a tiny house, I want to live in our right-sized house, but with less stuff.

Our home isn’t disorganized or cluttered. Things have a place. My husband, Steve, and I can easily retrieve and return items to their designated ‘homes.’  However, there are belongings that have overstayed their welcome. Those are the things that have been stored for a long time and are no longer used, needed, or wanted. They are taking up physical and emotional space. Their time has come to move on.

After returning from vacation, I set a long-term goal to reduce the amount of stuff I own. My plan isn’t a detailed room-by-room-do-this-by-x-date proposition. It’s a low-pressure, loose plan. I added one simple daily repeat on my to-do list that says, “Edit & release some stuff.”  There is no expectation other than to do something. I spend 15-60 minutes editing what I feel like working on that day.

In the last two weeks, I edited and organized clothing, shoes, handbags, toiletries, cleaning products, paper goods, dishes, and glasses. Additional edits included candles, vases, office supplies, books, photos, cards, letters, memorabilia, personal and business files, and email inbox. These items were from the dining room, entryway, laundry room, kitchen, office, main bedroom, and bathrooms.

I let go of

• Five 13-gallon bags of trash

• Two 30-gallon bags of trash

• Two 30-gallon bags of clothing and home goods for donations

• One bag of books for donations

• One bag of paper for recycling

• One bag of paper for shredding

• One container of pens for a friend

Like with all experiments, come learning. My ‘edit & release some stuff’ plan is no exception. There will be more insights, but here are seven discoveries I made so far.

7 Best Organizing Self-Help Discoveries Made With My New Simple Plan

1. Track Your Progress

There are many ways to enjoy progress, but for me, tracking with a simple chart helps me review and acknowledge my accomplishments. I created a Word document with three columns- date, area worked on, and result. Taking photos or journaling can also be helpful.

2. Respect Random Approach

Typical organizing wisdom encourages us to organize one area before moving on to the next. I’ve shared that advice with many clients. However, as logical as that sounds, it’s not always possible or desirable. Clients sometimes get bored working in one area or encounter emotionally charged belongings they are not ready to organize. With my approach, I gifted myself the option for randomness. Instead of a specific plan of what to edit each day, I let myself choose more intuitively. Which area do I feel like working on today? It keeps the pressure low and the satisfaction high.

3. Honor Your Emotions

Is organizing emotional? It can be. While editing, I experienced a range of feelings like happiness, joy, sadness, ambivalence, resistance, frustration, annoyance, guilt, exhaustion, satisfaction, and love. I let my emotions have the space to surface. When editing my cards, I found a beautiful, love-filled note written by my mom for my 40th birthday. I felt sad that she is gone and simultaneously felt her love and encouragement. 

4. Trust the Exit

Honestly, if I wasn’t logging my progress and noting the stuff I said goodbye to, I wouldn’t remember what was gone. I have no regrets and don’t miss anything that I released. It feels good.

“It’s liberating to live with less.”

— Linda Samuels, CPO-CD®, CVPO™

5. Live With Less

As each area or space is edited, I appreciate having less. For example, when I open the sticky note drawer, only my favorites are there, and the never-used ones are gone. When I get dressed, the clothes I like and wear most are in my closets and drawers. They have space to breathe, and it makes it easier for me to select what I’m going to wear. It’s liberating to live with less.

6. Rethink Your Space

One of the benefits of letting go is the opportunity to rethink your space. Having less visual and physical clutter makes it easier to improve flow and organization.  As I released stuff, I cleaned and asked a few questions. Is the space working as is? Or, could it use a slight tweak? Some areas were set. However, for others, I made improvements. For example, after the kitchen edit, I inserted freestanding cabinet shelves. This made use of wasted vertical space and also improved access to frequently used dishes.

7. Engage Self or Outside Help

While I’m making progress, I recognize the value of enlisting help. While I have released a lot, I’m pretty sure if someone supported and asked me questions as I edited, I’d let go of more. Help with facilitating decision-making is invaluable. For now, I continue to go it alone, coaching myself through the process. I will leave the door open to reach out for help if needed.

Have you been editing and organizing? Are you doing it on your own or did you get help? What did you learn? Did any of my discoveries resonate with you? I’d love to hear your thoughts. I invite you to join the conversation.

What is it about asking for help? Is it something you do readily? Or, do you tend to do or want to do everything yourself? There is no shame in enlisting help. So why do we procrastinate, stress, and delay getting support? As a professional organizer, I am used to receiving calls from overwhelmed folks who want help. I am also a person that at times, struggles to ask for assistance.

This happened recently to me. My mom died in March. While many of the things around her death I completed, I still have a few things to do. One of those tasks is getting her footstone made. I wanted the same company that made my father’s footstone, help make my mom’s. I obsessed about getting the footstone created and installed. I added a task to my list but kept postponing it. Maybe I wasn’t ready. Or, perhaps ordering the footstone made my mom’s death feel more final. I didn’t move forward or ask for help. I stayed stuck.

And then last week, the day arrived. The cue to work on mom’s footstone project appeared on my to-do list again. I pulled out my file, found the name and number of the monument company, picked up the phone, and dialed. Here’s the incredible thing. Within a few minutes, they knew who I was, where my mom was buried and gave me clear next steps for getting the footstone made. A half-hour later, they emailed me all of the details- the quote, forms to complete, and checks to write.

I had been stressed and obsessing for months. By enlisting help from a professional, I was able to take those next steps. Getting the process started was such a huge relief. It felt like a giant weight was lifted. I couldn’t believe how simple it was and how long I had berated myself for not getting help. One phone call yielded such comfort. 

“There is no shame in enlisting help.”

— Linda Samuels, CPO-CD®, CVPO™

Then it hit me that mine and my clients’ experiences are similar. When potential clients contact me, they often are overwhelmed, stuck, and have felt that way for a long time. They describe reasons they procrastinate about getting help, which include:

• Embarrassed for needing help

• Despair that they feel like a lost cause

• Unsure of who to call

• Frustration that they “should” be able to get organized on their own

They feel their disorganization and situation is impossible. However, when you are willing and ready for change, movement is possible.

“When you are willing and ready for change, movement is possible.”

— Linda Samuels, CPO-CD®, CVPO™

My clients make positive shifts during their virtual organizing sessions, and it’s a beautiful change to see. I’ve written about this before with the types of transformations they have during a typical one-hour session. Enlisting help is beneficial. Virtual organizing clients might begin their sessions feeling overwhelmed, but the story doesn’t end there. Here are some recent thoughts clients expressed at the end of their sessions:

• “I see the light at the end of the tunnel.” 

• “I know I can do it. I can pair things down.”

•  “It was kind of overwhelming but easier than I thought.”

• “Saying goodbye to the past- it felt good, cathartic.”

• “Amazing. This is such a good feeling.”

•  “My pile of ‘going’ is getting bigger.”

•  “Things feel mentally more manageable.”

•  “This feels so good what we did today. At the beginning of the session, I felt like crying. Now I feel giddy.”

Like my clients, I felt better and moved forward when I sought out help. When was the last time you reached out for support? What did you experience? Was the help you received beneficial? I’d love to hear your thoughts. I invite you to join the conversation. 

What happens when you need to work, push, and get things done, yet you feel like doing the exact opposite? When needs and wants conflict, which one wins out? Are you able to let go? Do you forge ahead despite the competing feelings? Do you compromise? Do you listen to the voice that is pulling you in the ‘opposite’ direction? Does procrastination take hold?

As I’ve described before, my natural tendency is to push myself. It’s not that I’m always working. I’m not. I purposely take breaks, have work boundaries, and make time to not do. However, I can still be hard on myself. It’s this deep sense I have to continually strive and complete. It’s not necessarily a negative thing, but there are times, like now, when my usual mode of operating competes with the loss and grief I’m experiencing. My typically wider bandwidth feels much narrower these days. It is only a few weeks since my mom died, and I have less energy.

“I was willing to let go of my expectations and listen to what my heart and mind needed.”

— Linda Samuels, CPO-CD®, CVPO™

I gifted myself a compromise. Instead of writing more, I’ll share a video of the places I’ve been exploring with you. I’ve enjoyed being outside in the spring air to walk, see, smell, capture, and experience its beauty and magnificence. It’s just what I needed. Seeing the Hudson Valley landscape green and burst with color again feels beautifully affirming and hopeful.

I was willing to let go of my expectations and listen to what my heart and mind needed. Quiet time with nature called. What have you let go of recently? I’d love to hear your thoughts. I invite you to join the conversation.

In my life and the organizing work, I do with clients, letting go can be accompanied by loss and intense emotions. Loss can be of a loved one, a move away from a treasured home, a change in family structure, or a job.

Even when a change is something we want, letting go of what was, is inevitable. Because without letting go, we cannot move forward and remain stuck in the past. For some, letting go can be freeing. For others, the process is painful. It depends on the person and circumstance.

Letting Go Slowly

My mom died last month. I’ve been thinking a lot about the ways I’ve had to let go in these years. There has been letting go of her as her dementia worsened, along with the physical stuff that she owned. About four years ago, we moved mom from her home of almost 60 years into a memory care unit in an assisted living facility. At that time, I cleared out and sold her house. This was the home I grew up in and that our family gathered in for almost six decades. 

There was so much letting go that happened then. While the family wanted many of my parents’ belongings, there were many things they didn’t take. The leftovers were sold, recycled, donated, or discarded. We let go of the house contents and then the actual house. It was necessary, but I felt a profound loss and shift. 

More Letting Go

By the time I moved my mom into The Ambassador, her possessions fit into the contents of one room. She had just what she needed. No more. No less. I decorated her room before moving in so she would feel comfortable being surrounded by her favorite art, music, family photos, and piano.

After she died, I cleared out her room. It struck me how simple the process was compared to clearing out her home. The most challenging work I already did. But I noticed something interesting. While I had loving offers from my husband and kids to help pack up her room, I needed to do it myself. For me, part of letting go included touching her things one last time. I carefully packed up the framed pictures. I washed and gently folded her clothes before passing them on. For so many years, I had taken care of my mom and all of her things. I wanted to give them one last loving touch goodbye as I packed them up and routed them to family or the donation place.

“Letting go requires patience, time, readiness, and space to get there.”

— Linda Samuels, CPO-CD®, CVPO™

Balancing Loss

Grief isn’t something you get over. It’s something you live with that never entirely goes away but varies in intensity. I said earlier that one reason we let go is so we can move forward. And I get that. I believe that. But I also know that letting go requires patience, time, readiness, and space to get there. To help balance the emotions and grief, I’ve spent a lot of time these past weeks taking walks, resting, meditating, writing, talking with family and friends, getting fresh air, noticing the spring flowers, and being in the woods or near water. These help me focus on the present, reflect on the past, slowly let go, and move on. 

Some types of letting go are more energizing. This one, losing my mom and wrapping up her life, feels different. I’m being gentle with myself as I continue letting go, handle the remaining details of mom’s life, and find my way forward.

Is letting go a challenge for you? Does it feel different when it is accompanied by loss? What helps you let go? I’d love to hear your thoughts. I invite you to join the conversation.